Mary and Ed Liechty moved from Indianapolis to Goshen after 51 years of active involvement with First Mennonite Church. As a parting gift to FMC and MennoExpressions, Mary shared the following vignettes, reflecting on their time here and on how they grew in their lives alongside the church.

Young and Uncertain

We were twenty-two, newly married, and entering an exciting, and slightly scary, new stage in life. I, Mary, was starting my first RN job as a professional nurse at IU hospital, and Ed was continuing medical school here in Indianapolis. We rented a little apartment with turquoise sinks, tub and toilet on west Michigan St. The drug store across the street had a sketchy freezer in which there were “meats” of questionable source. We had never actually lived in a city before. Downtown Indy was a bit frightening in the evening. There was nothing to do; it was rather dark, and if you walked there at dusk, kind people would ask you why you were out and tell you to get home.

Finding and Building Community

On South Kessler Blvd was a little Mennonite Church property that beckoned to us. Started by 1W folks in the 1950s, it was vibrant and very welcoming to us. Many attendees were transient, just moving through as they got a graduate degree or did a residency on their way to a more permanent job. The church was young, as were most of the attendees. Very few had any extended family in the area, and many of us had to work on weekends, so those who frequented the building became family for each other. It was a safe place where people had created community. We shared meals, camped, celebrated life events, holidays and supported each other in tough times.

I have memories of being in the church basement making a Thanksgiving turkey with others after many of us realized we wouldn’t be with family for the holiday, an ad hoc potluck, if you will.

As a congregation we spent a weekend each winter at Bradford Woods south of Mooresville. There we relaxed while everyone took care of everyone else’s children. We sledded, walked in the woods, slept in the cabins, cooked and shared food, enjoyed a nature-based service and had a Saturday night party that included a talent show. That event was highly anticipated as we saw different sides of individuals; creativity oozed and the children participated fully. Laughter was the predominant sound.

We also did spring or fall camping as a group, with Mounds State Park and Spring Mill State Park being favorite destinations. On one of our camping trips, a huge storm came through, and we woke up floating in our tents!

Gathering together for meals and quilting in homes were additional community-building activities. We even produced two children’s musicals and took at least one on the road to Kokomo.

Struggles & Growing Pains

There are many beautiful memories, but let’s be honest: there were also some real struggles, both for us as individuals and for us as a congregation.

Ed and I went through our first two pregnancies and a miscarriage with the help of supportive friends, many of whom are still at FMC. We went through life’s blessings and crises with those who were here.

This mixture of struggles and growth occurred also at the congregational level. From the beginning, the congregation had a policy of consensus in decision making. As the church body grew, so did the struggle with consensus making. We recall long meetings where some voices were always louder than others and decisions were postponed due to an inability to see eye to eye. We had come from different branches of Mennonite or non- Mennonite thinking, which impacted how we saw theology being put into practice.

It was during that time that at least one member and the pastor at the time suggested everyone could be in a “working group.” The purpose of the groups was, first of all, to go over a list of items on which leadership was requesting feedback and to formulate our thoughts to share back with leadership. Secondly, we were to share time together. This was a successful model for a long time and helped reduce our long business meetings a great deal. It also helped us get to know each other in deeper ways and began moving us away from total consensus and into compromise. At present our small groups do not function to do church business, but they continue to allow us to support one another.

Eventually FMC outgrew the space on Kessler Blvd., and “we” built the church building on Knollton Road that we now inhabit. I say “we” in quotations because Ed and I were not living here during the time the church was built. We had moved to West Virginia for four years…then ended up returning to enjoy it. But we remember the stories of evening and Saturday painting, roofing activities and members doing whatever it took to raise this wonderful barn, now needing further upkeep.

The congregation of First Mennonite has offered us so many opportunities for growth through the years. As I reflect on that growth, I know it wasn’t always easy. Some of that growth included interpersonal struggles and theological differences in which there was a good deal of pain.

But mostly, I remember being encouraged: encouraged as a parent, encouraged to try to song-lead, encouraged to take on some leadership roles, encouraged to speak up in discussion, and encouraged to assist others.

Lessons Learned

As I look back on 51 years of involvement at FMC, I have become more aware of valuable life lessons I learned through these experiences. I was given the most amazing gift of walking with various people from the congregation into the end of their lives on earth. This was something I feared, but sitting with at least four people from the congregation as they moved into that transition was such a learning experience and helped me process my own perceptions of death. I am grateful for those who welcomed us into their dying space, and feel I missed out with those I was unable to accompany.

I learned to say goodbye as people came and went from the church and to treasure what they taught me, even if they left for less than desirable reasons. I became more aware of the broader lessons I could learn. That includes dealing with the formation of Shalom. It was a hard one for me to lose worshiping with that group on a regular basis, but there was respect for the desire to create a new congregation. As Ed has said, though, the hardest goodbyes have been when attendees have just drifted off, never to return after significant time with us. We like to say goodbye.

Through really tough times of disagreement, I learned more about how to talk with people when our perceptions diverge. I still have more to learn, but caring about FMC and the people here gave me the desire to grow more in how I relate. My work with Care Team and sharing space as people died or dealt with loss allowed me to understand the concept of “Being” with people as opposed to “Doing For” people. Also, being led by Black leaders, whom I loved, contributed to better insight into the racism around and in us. Seeing this congregation grow in our awareness of sexuality and gender variations has been a personal delight. And being challenged on my perception of disability has also been a growing experience.

Although there are some conflicts we would have been happy to avoid, and we became impatient with the time it often took to move from conflict to loving conversation to a sense of choosing to move forward, it’s been exciting to see what moving forward has offered us. This congregation is healthier because of those struggles.

It has always been our choice to stay here and to work through any conflict. We realize that’s not for everyone. There isn’t any special award for those who make that choice. It’s personality and situation and where people are in their own lives. Some people must leave for their next step in personal growth. For us, FMC has been family, and we couldn’t leave our family without seeing things through. We haven’t always given grace to others in the process, but we have been pushed to awareness of what it means to do so. That includes giving grace to ourselves as well as others. We are all humans who are seeking a way to live in this world through our understanding of the teachings of Jesus. As anabaptists, we must challenge each other with love and develop a willingness to allow ourselves and others to grow. Sometimes that means parting ways, and that is painful.

Parting Words

As Ed and I make a move to our retirement home, we leave with grateful hearts and indelible memories. We are excited for what is ahead at FMC with Jonathan and Ndunge in pastoral leadership, and with so many of you in active service to the church and community. We encourage you to make it as much fun as you can. A congregation with a sense of humor that can laugh together would seem a healthy one.

If you are new, or reluctant to work with a commission, find something that interests you in the short term and step in to test the waters. There are many volunteer actions to consider. Assist with children’s Sunday School or nursery time. Join an adult education class on occasion to stretch your thoughts on living from an anabaptist biblical perspective. Be a greeter! As the draft seems to be looming again, talk with those remaining few who came to Indy in 1W service and consider how we guide our young people. Be Care Team for each other. And offer yourselves and others grace as mistakes are made and misunderstandings occur. We will miss this community.

There are so many people I would have liked to mention, but in the hopes of not extending this article any further, and in fear of leaving someone out, I chose to mention none. You know if you have been with us on any part of this journey.

About the Author

Mary and Ed Liechty

Mary and Ed Liechty now live in the Goshen Greencroft community, where they are enjoying old friends and new activities. Guests are happily welcomed if you come this way.

Living Faith: Reflections on 51 Years In and Out of FMC